Beat the mummy burnout!
When the going gets tough, mums tend to keep going. Here’s how to cope when it feels like your to-do list will never end…
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When everyone helps out with the little jobs around the house, you keep mummy burnout at bay. Make a chore chart with a reward system to avoid the continuous nagging. You can design your own fun chore chart at www.chorecharts.com or download different free designs.
Enjoy your ‘me time’
“Don’t feel guilty for spending a few mornings in your PJs watching daytime TV when you get the chance,” says Emily Field, 32, from London, mum to Beatrice, 14 months. “But don’t make a habit of it. As the weeks went by I put a TV curfew on myself – no TV until 5pm to stop me slipping into the habit. It made me feel like I wasn’t wasting my day and even if it only meant a short walk to get a coffee, it meant I’d achieved something with my day which in turn made me feel more positive.”
Be yourself
“The women who adapt best to motherhood aren’t always on a high,” says Robyn Sheldon, author of The Mama Bamba Way. “They may mourn the loss of their pregnancies, cry quite freely, fairly often and for various reasons.”
Let go of your need for your baby to behave in a certain way or sleep better than he does, you can’t control it. Be patient with bonding and breastfeeding. Life isn’t perfect, so be easy on yourself.
Talk about it
“Often new mums hold in a lot of fears and emotions,” says Lisa Barnwell, director of Me & My Baby Clinic. “Many avoid treatments at this time, but seeing a qualified professional can help on many levels – it’s completely non-judgmental, guarantees confidentiality and a good therapist will have a wealth of advice and experience to pass on to you.”
Talk to your GP, or Health Visitor about counselling groups or services in your area if you want to talk.
Learn to file
Losing your rag can happen over the smallest things – like where you put that letter about a doctor’s appointment or a party invite. File things as you go along in pretty folders you don’t have to keep hidden away. You’ll be so glad you did when you need something.
Watch your health
One in four of us don’t cover our mouths when we sneeze, according to US researchers. Help guard against passing on germs that will make you rundown (and hope that other mums are doing the same to you) by being more careful and sneezing into a tissue that you can throw away.
Take a cold shower
Alternating the water temperature between hot and cold when you wash boosts your metabolism and your circulation. This will make you more alert and beat any sluggish feelings for the day ahead. We’re not saying take an icy bath, but a blast of colder water before you hop out of the shower will do you the world of good.
Heal with your hands
A mini massage works wonders on easing a build-up of tensions. Even just five minutes a day will help.
Find a hobby
“Do an uplifting activity that takes you out of the mummy zone at least once a week,” says lifecoach Jessica Chivers ( from www.beyoubutbetter.co.uk). “Something just for you that’s not connected to being a parent. I sing with Rock Choir every Thursday and it’s so good for the soul.”
Be prepared
“Checking your baby changing bag each evening and restocking fresh nappies, bags, cream, wipes, muslins, snacks and a spare outfit is a real time saver,” says Kirsten Baxter, says mum of two and MD of mum boutique Bella Mama. “Knowing that bag is ready to grab when you head off to a baby class, shopping or to meet friends is one less thing to stress over when you’re running late – again.”
Watch what you eat
“Don’t just focus on the baby, make sure you look after your own health too by eating proper, nutritious meals,” says Leigh-Anne Miles, practitioner at Innersound. “In South Korea, women eat seaweed soup each day for 14 days after the birth (plus other healthy food), which detoxes the blood supply as well as helping to recharge your energy levels quicker.”
Have your cake…
“Don’t try to keep up appearances,” says Catherine Warrilow, 31, from Oxford, mum to Noah, 2, and mummy blogger at www.babygenie.co.uk.
“I was determined to go to a girls’ brunch with my 5-week-old baby with something homemade – I arrived with drop scones, after throwing the batter into the pan, and arrived frazzled and completely unable to relax, says Catherine. "Buy something nice on the way instead and you’ll enjoy social occasions far more," she adds.
Carry help around
To perk you up...
MamaBabyBliss Bliss Stick (£5, www.mamababybliss.com) has lime oil and bergamot to rub on your pulse points and lift your energy levels.
To switch off…
Rescue Remedy Night Liquid Melts (£7.95 for 28, www.rescueremedy.co.uk) dissolve on the tongue to help calm your mind at bedtime.
Did you know...
A mum’s working day is more than 15 hours long. That includes office hours, plus the school and nursery run and household chores. No wonder we’re all so pooped!
How celebs beat the burnout
“Lee and I were strong before, but now we’re even closer,” says celeb mother Denise Van Outen, mum to Betsy, 3 months, and wife to West End star Lee Mead. “We’re still in our honeymoon bubble and make sure we have a date night once a week.”
“When you have a child, you do feel tired and so I need to actively start taking care of myself,” says Secret Diary of A Call Girl star Billie Piper, mum to Winston, 1. “I’ve become a lot more health conscious since having Winston and need to start taking vitamins.”
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